When you start a new love connection, it can be tough to see all of the potential problems that could arise. You go through a honeymoon period in which you are willing to overlook their imperfections or convince yourself that you can deal with them. But, as time passes, you’ll notice that the little white falsehoods they say will snowball into something bigger. Finally, if you see a lot of problems from the start, don’t be afraid to terminate the relationship because things are unlikely to improve. Keeping this in mind, here are some early warning signs that the relationship is doomed.
8 Red Flags Early in Your Relationship
1. You are rarely on the same wavelength.
The fact that you are on two completely separate communication wavelengths is a significant warning signal that your relationship will always be fraught with drama. For example, you may be the type who appreciates transparency and sharing as much as possible, whereas others are more secretive. Or you strive to follow the rule of not going to bed angry at each other, but they let their disagreements fester indefinitely. These issues will eventually lead to anger and dissatisfaction, as well as a feeling that they do not really love or respect you.
2. At Least One of You Has Been Unfaithful
If you’ve established that the two of you are in a committed relationship but one of you is still cheating, it’s doubtful that anything will change unless the cheater alters their perspective on commitment and respect. Unfortunately, they are unlikely to do so. Even if you are willing to forgive each other and try to repair your relationship, it is only a matter of time until it occurs again.
3. They Cannot Be Honest With You
Whether they are lying or hiding facts on purpose, these are signals that there are cracks in the relationship that cannot be repaired. You may be tempted to skirt the topic out of fear of escalating into a more severe fight, but doing so will only lead to envy and heartbreak in the long term. It is critical to catch it early in the bidding process. Inform them in a non-confrontational manner that their tiny lies have wounded you. This is the only way to determine whether or not the problem can be resolved.
4. They exhibit signs of a toxic personality from the start.
When you first meet someone, they are usually on their best behavior because they want you to see how normal and laid-back they are. If they continue to exhibit inappropriate behavior throughout this time, you should move away because it will only get worse and maybe abusive. Examples include disrespecting your limits on a first date, bossing you around, or being unpleasant to waitstaff at a restaurant.
5. You Do Not Adhere To The Same Financial Philosophy
Finances are one of the most difficult issues that couples face. So, if you and your partner have different spending and saving habits, be aware that once you’re a married couple, these disparities will come to light because you’ll be dealing with paying rent, utilities, and other spending decisions. Setting and adhering to norms requires effort and a desire to cooperate. If you can’t, prepare for a never-ending money argument.
6. They Don’t Respect Your Limits
When limits are not established at the beginning of a relationship, it is almost certain to fail. You must realize your personal wants while giving your mate unconditional love. This is why it’s critical that you talk about topics like how much time you’ll spend together vs time apart, as well as your relationship goals. Addressing these issues as soon as possible will help you avoid future misunderstandings and conflict in the long run.
7. Substance Abuse Problems Emerge
Discover the reasons why your mate is more than simply a casual drinker. Are they doing it to de-stress, for example? Is it something they really must have in order to get through the day? Someone who has an alcohol issue deserves sympathy, but they must also be willing to recognize they have an addiction and seek help. Attending couples counseling might be a fantastic way to show support and address the issue together. Unfortunately, for many couples, it becomes an impassable barrier.
8. You Have Distinct Social Expectations.
You and your partner do not have to have identical personalities for the relationship to function, but if you have fundamentally different attitudes to socializing (for example, they want to go out every night while you prefer to stay at home), it may be difficult to make it work. If you talk about it freely and are willing to compromise, you might be able to reach a happy medium. Otherwise, you may only see each other infrequently, which contradicts the purpose of being in a relationship.